I Almost Lost You
by Aliemah
Summary: Thane and Shepard have already been through hell, but not everything is quite settled between them. Requested by a friend on tumblr, originally posted on tumblr. Post-ME2 fluff.


_Author's Note: Originally posted on tumblr. This was a kiss prompt requested by a friend. "I almost lost you" kiss with Thane X Shepard. Enjoy!_

* * *

The last platform to the Normandy collapsed, the jump near impossible. It was either jump, and risk missing, falling to her death, send the Normandy to safety and sacrificing her life for billions, or risking the Normandy by getting it closer. The Collectors were intent on shooting her down, and they were getting closer.

"Come on, Natalie, jump!" Joker called out, holding a rifle and trying to pick off some Collectors. Next to him was Garrus, who was sniping just over her shoulder, Thane just inside the door, clutching his side where he'd been nicked by a bullet. With a huff, she took a few steps towards the Collectors, to get a running start, and then she broke into a full on sprint, pushing off as her foot hit the edge of the ground, launching herself into the air.

 _I'm not going to make it._ She realized as soon as she'd kicked off. She didn't have the energy to land a solid jump, and she was going to come up short. Her eyes flicked over to Thane who was watching, and she cursed herself upon seeing the terror flash in his eyes. _Damn it, I don't want him to have to relive this any time he thinks of me! I don't want it to end this way!_

Then she realized if she stretched her arms out, she could try to catch the lip of the Normandy. She heard a metal clunk, and she felt herself slipping for a moment.

"I got you." Garrus grunted, gripping her arm. He dropped his gun to grip her with his other hand, pulling her up. Thane moved quickly past Joker to help as well, wound be damned. The Normandy began to bank to the side, causing the three to practically fall inside the hull once they were standing. The three collided against the wall, and fell to the floor.

"Sorry!" Joker called out, once the door slammed shut. Natalie sighed, and even though she was being crushed beneath Garrus, she felt herself begin to relax. As soon as the weight was off her, she got up, and went to stand behind Joker, not able to relax just yet. They still had to make it back through the relay.

"Just get us out of here, that'll be enough payback for slamming us into a wall." she murmured, knowing he was focusing on doing just that. She turned half-way, "Garrus, get Thane to Chakwas." she then turned around once she saw the two walking towards the elevator. Miranda showed up not a minute later.

"Shepard-"

"Miranda, not now." she said, moving her head towards the woman, but not taking her eyes off the window, showing their path home as clear. It seemed as though the Oculus agents were no longer a threat, or had been completely eradicated before the actual assault on the base. That was a relief to her.

"Lining up with the relay." Joker said, sounding nervous, still. She didn't see any signs of pursuit, and assumed that meant that the Collectors were scrambling. "Passing through in fifteen."

She smiled, gripping the back of his seat anxiously, watching as they approached the massive red relay that would take them back to a familiar galaxy. The first thing she would do was stop on Omega, to give the crew a proper rest, and to celebrate their victory. It wasn't the best place to throw a party, but there was sure to be some good alcohol for everyone.

"We're through the relay." Joker sighed, making sure to get it over the comm. She could hear the collective sigh aboard the ship, along with cheering from those who had been rescued and brought back to the ship. The weight on Natalie's shoulders dropped, and it felt like she'd been hauling Grunt around this whole time.

"Great job, Joker. I want you to head to Omega when we're on the other side. I think we've earned some shore leave."

"You got it, Commander."

She smiled, and turned to face Miranda, ready to hear what she had to say.

"We put up one hell of a fight back there, Shepard." she smiled, looking sad, "The Illusive Man… He's not going to be happy about this."

"Don't worry, I'll deal with him when the time comes."

"The moment you become his enemy, he will stop at nothing to end you. I just want you to know that everyone here… We're leaving Cerberus. We'll follow you wherever you want us to go, Shepard." she'd spoken softly, and that caused Natalie to actually stop and think. She'd effectively made every member of her crew a target. But, if what Miranda was saying was true, then they knew the risks, and they were willing to do the right thing.

"Everything will be alright, Miranda." She reached up and put her hand on her shoulder, "Take some time to rest, he won't be coming after us so soon. Not while we've got plenty of pissed off, and lethal shooters aboard."

"I suppose that's true. Thank you."

Natalie began to walk down towards the CIC, looking around at what damage had been done during the attack. It didn't look like there was much, which gave her some relief. After checking in with some of the crew, she got a message on her omni-tool that there was a call waiting for her in the conference room. She made her way there, grinding her teeth the whole time, ready to face him and call him out.

She was done with this bullshit. The Illusive Man might have started with good intentions - something she could follow. However, he was turning in a direction she wasn't willing to follow, or help supply. Wanting to keep the Collector Base for information against the Reapers was one thing, but she'd elected to destroy it in the end. Now, she could see he was in the early stages of obsession on the subject.

"Joker, lose this channel." she said, walking off the projector, back to the people who mattered. Natalie would walk away with her head held high, and on her own terms. If she was wrong, she would pay for it, but she wouldn't have any regrets because this wasn't her. Cerberus wasn't aligned with her moral code anymore.

She was still in her armor, and she figured she could take it off. Changing course after exiting the room, she headed to the elevator.

"EDI,"

"Yes, Commander?"

"Could you tell me where Thane is?" she asked as soon as the elevator door shut.

"Mr. Krios is waiting in your cabin, Shepard."

"Oh. Thank you."

"Logging you out."

What was he doing waiting for her? Did he want to talk about what had happened at the base? Ask why she'd sent him to escort the crew, instead of stay to help them fight? He wasn't angry, was he?

"Siha." his voice called out when she stepped through her cabin door. She smiled softly, glad to see him push off from the edge of her desk. He looked like he'd been thinking hard.

"EDI told me you were up here… I was going to change out of my armor and then go see you, but I guess you beat me to my own plans." she said, already reaching across her chest to her opposite shoulder to unlatch her armor.

"Let me help you." he said, coming over to stand in front of her. She made no objections, and he seemed to be doing a much quicker job than she was at removing her armor. She noticed he avoided the area around her hips, which she began working on.

"Thane… can I ask why you came up here?" she asked once her armor was set to the side, beneath the fish tank. She was in her undersuit, and when he stepped forward, she could feel some warmth roll off him, from how close he was. His hand came up to cup her cheek, and there was no hesitation when he leaned forward to kiss her. She threw her arms around his neck and felt his shift to pull her closer. The hand left her cheek and went to hold the back of her head gently, as he hugged her tightly. She felt dazed, leaning against him.

"I wanted to make sure you were alright." he said quietly.

"Shouldn't I be the one worrying about you?" she chuckled, pulling back to glance down, glad to see there was a bandage underneath the tear in his clothing. Her hand smoothed over the spot gently, glad he wasn't flinching.

"Doctor Chakwas assures me I will be fine. The bullet grazed me." he said, reaching up and taking hold of her chin gently, turning her gaze back to him. "I'm more worried about you. You're the one who has been carrying all the weight."

"I feel a lot better than I did a few hours ago." she smiled, shoulders dropping once more as if to make a point. "I just want to take a shower, and rest, right now."

"Then I will leave and let you rest." he said, taking a step back and turning towards the door. She frowned, and grabbed his hand.

"You don't have to leave. I never said I didn't want company." She grinned when he stopped and turned back towards her. "Let me take a shower, and then I'll come back out, okay?" He nodded, and she headed into her bathroom, knowing he would make himself comfortable.

She turned on the water for her shower, then stripped her suit off, kicking it into the corner with a few uniforms that needed to be washed. Stepping into the warm spray already made her feel better. Just knowing that the sweat and grime of the Collector Base was being washed off was enough to make her feel comfortable in her own skin again. Natalie began washing her hair, having not washed it for a day or two now, and began humming softly to herself, and eventually pairing words to her tune. Relaxing wasn't taking as much effort as she thought it might have taken. By the time the water was shut off, and she was reaching for her towel, she was yawning. She made sure to dry herself off completely before leaving to get herself dressed. At least she didn't have to worry about being exposed around Thane.

Stepping out of the bathroom, she had a soft smile on her face. Thane was laying flat on her bed with his hand folded across his stomach. He looked as though he were meditating, so she did her best to avoid bothering him, despite knowing he'd probably been watching and listening to her since the bathroom door opened.

Natalie stepped in front of her dresser, and dropped the towel wrapped around her body, then threw on some of her lounge pants, and an old tank top. She then bent over to pick up the towel and carry it back to the bathroom to let it hang up and dry. Her hair was damp, but she knew it would be dry by the time she fell asleep. So, she finally made her way back to her bed, only now noticing that Thane was on the half that she didn't normally sleep on. She sat on her usual side, and glanced over at Thane, glad he opened his eyes.

"You have a lovely voice." he said.

"I didn't think you would hear that." she chuckled, blushing as she laid on her side to face him, "But thank you."

It was silent and when he didn't move, she took it upon herself to let him know she did care for him. Last night hadn't just been a fling, and she genuinely hoped he understood that. She reached out and brushed her hand against his arm, and she watched as his statue-like posture suddenly melted away, and he willingly pulled her against himself, practically cradling her in his arms. Natalie sighed softly and wrapped an arm around his waist, hugging him.

She didn't know how long they remained like this, but she felt herself falling asleep, and she pulled away so that her head could rest on the pillow, rather than his arm. Trapping him here was something she didn't want to do. The hand on her waist slipped around to hold her again, and she didn't know what was happening until she felt Thane kissing her again, gently pushing her onto her back, so that neither was straining their neck.

His lips felt strange to her at first, but she'd already learned to appreciate the unique texture. It was familiar, yet she couldn't place her finger on what it reminded her of. Regardless, she enjoyed his kisses, and how tenderly he had shown her he cared for her. Especially in such a short amount of time. Then their soft kiss changed. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, as he deepened their kiss, the intensity of it changing. He was almost pushing her down, as well as squeezing her against himself.

 _Oh,_ she thought, _I didn't realize he might still be processing what happened earlier_. She often forgot that most normal people didn't process traumatic events nearly as quick as she did. It came with the constant threat of death looming over her shoulder.

Thane seemed confused as the kiss slowed, and he eventually let out a hard breath when he broke their kiss. Natalie was trying not to gasp for air. She brought her hands up to his head as he rested it on her shoulder since he was laying over her. She felt something on her shoulder, and she could feel the physical ache in her chest as she registered that it was a .tear that had left his eye.

"Thane…" she whispered softly, wrapping her arms around him tightly, sitting up just slightly. "It's alright, I'm right here. I promise this isn't a dream." she continued saying, almost chanting it to him. His grip was firm, but it began to relax after a few minutes.

"I don't know what else I could do if you weren't here, Natalie."

"You have Kolyat. If you can't be here for me, then you promise to be there for him." she said softly, glad he lifted his weeping face with a smile. She ran her thumb over his cheek.

"Always thinking of others before yourself."

"You know me." she stretched herself forward to give him a quick kiss, then murmuring, "I care about you a lot, Thane. I don't want to see you upset over what might have happened. It didn't happen, so you don't need to worry about it."

"I will try." he nodded, shifting back to her side, letting his hands linger, since she didn't tell him to keep them to himself.

It had been too long since she'd just been touched by someone else, without any ulterior motive behind it. Natalie let her eyes close, and his hands wandered along her curves, making absolute sure this she was real, and that he wasn't hallucinating. It was soothing, and when she felt herself drifting off to sleep, she turned a bit to face him, laying on his arm so that he couldn't leave. She heard his low chuckle as his arms wrapped around her, and once his scent was surrounding her, she slipped into unconsciousness. They would be okay.

Thane wasn't going to have to be without her any time soon.


End file.
